A Public Thank You to the Father of my Beloved Angels

June 16, 2019

My dearest Rod,

 

It has been an engaging, stressful, frustrating, loving, and not so loving stretch of 15 years between you and I, and Oh, have I grown!  If I could say one thing for this relationship, it is, Oh, have I grown.  It has pushed me beyond my limits of what I thought I was capable of handling and we have reached a further determination to be our best selves every day.  I know that is true, and I know we each solve these dilemmas within ourselves as each day passes and another comes to play.  We are so alive and loving and free now because we have looked at each and every aspect of our relationship as it needed to be seen, and here we are.

 

15 years in, divorced and looking for our beloveds, and still sharing the same physical household, still requesting our needs be met and still acting as if it can be a beautiful exchange.  I thank you so much for that, for that constant belief and knowing that we can be free and we can exchange love and value in each and every circumstance we are in.

 

I don't know why we came together initially, me the yogi, the aesthetic, the longing for greed in a land far beyond that of this small town we are in; you, the right wing republican christian, happy to be challenged by my outside beliefs, and your father who wouldn't even speak to me or acknowledge me in the beginning, and your mother who whispered bible verses in your ear just loud enough so that I could hear.  Oh my, what a whirlwind we were in, but through it all, I challenged my own beliefs on so many things and you grew and grew into each and every situation, as you kept choosing to accept another ring on the ladder of change.  It still isn't easy because we have our separate ways now more than anything, but I am so happy you decided to be a father to these two beautiful, divine beings we invited into our space.  

 

They make me so happy each and every day; their brilliant minds, their sharp intellects, their glowing hearts of fire, their individual expressions of life; I am so indebted to you for bringing them in with me.  They are the light of my life for sure and I am so grateful for them every single day.  

And, I thank you!  I thank you!  I thank you!  I thank you! ... for being there for them, for accepting them as they are in their full unlimited potential and depth, and for constantly challenging your own beliefs about what it means to raise a child in this divine light of full truth and acceptance of all that they are and who they came here to be!

 

We have such beautiful children and I am so grateful for them, and for you bringing them in with me, every single day.  Thank you for being you.  Thank you for challenging your beliefs.  Thank you for seeing that everything is always divine and free, and that we can live this way in everything we are doing every single day.  

 

And I thank you for challenging the beliefs of all of those who tell you that you are crazy to be still living with your ex wife in this way.  We are Free.  We are Free  We are Free.

 

I do so hope to have my own space soon where the kids can freely play between our spaces in whatever way they feel free, but for now, I just want to say thank you for everything you are doing every day!

 

In deepest gratitude and love,

 

Kai

 

 

 

 

 

 

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